(continued from before)
I started taking my behind-the-counter medication today. This was to be my savior and I feel like just buying it should make me better, especially since I don’t have a prescription plan apparently. I need to pay more attention to stuff. Anyway, I got a cough suppressant and antibiotics. My understanding is that antibiotics are supposed to kill bacteria. After some rudimentary research of bronchitis on Wikipedia, I discovered that less than 10% of bronchitis cases are caused by bacteria. Which means that they may as well be sugar tablets. Or gold stars. I also found that bronchitis has nothing to do with coughing for 14 days straight. I guess I should probably stop going to see a doctor working out of the back of a Chuck E Cheese. So either my doctor is lying to me or Wikipedia is wrong. Or I misunderstood something. And honestly, it’s pretty even money.
My sister says that I should eat some yogurt after taking the antibiotics. This is because antibiotics kill all bacteria and some bacteria is good bacteria, necessary to digest food. Yogurt apparently slows down the killing of the good bacteria or contains some supplemental good bacteria in it or something that helps with the adverse effects of antibiotics. This made a lot of sense because I didn’t understand it. Read that again because it’s written how I meant it. This is the same approach I use to cars and women. So I did that. And I took the magic beans. It shouldn’t be long before I am completely cured, right? Well, last night was my worst yet as far as uncontrollable coughing fits are concerned. It probably wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t have to breathe the entire night. I think that’s the approach I’m going to implement tonight. Wish me luck.
Still Standing Right Here…