I’d be pissed if I were a cicada. They waited 17 years to come out and they finally come out and it’s been rainy and crappy since they got here. I’d be like “fuck this man, i’m going back in the ground. i’ll see you all next year. i mean, why the fuck do we all gotta come out at the same time and shit? do other animals do this? fuck no! dem fuckin bees been here since i was here last time and i can here them out there makin honey an shit every year. it’s bullshit! this is my one two-week vacation every 17 years and i ain’t spendin it outside in the fuckin rain! dat’s why we ain’t indigenous to seattle an shit. peace out.” At least that’s how I figured I’d talk if I were a cicada. But it’s hard to really tell.
This letter isn’t so much a quote of the day as it is a plea for roommates in the fall. And not to put the squeeze on, but I need to know by tonight. All my roommates are engaged and moving out. I’m to that age now I guess. I actually went to two weddings in the same week. So I figured that hanging out with younger people would better my odds of feeling younger. Nope. All 3 of my roommates are engaged at 22, 23 and 22 years old. I’m going to have to start hanging out with high school kids now just to make sure they aren’t all getting married. At least at that age, they’re only having kids (ouch). Sorry, I got off track. I AM LOOKING FOR TWO ROOMMATES BEGINNING AUGUST 2004 IN CATONSVILLE. They’re moving out and I need to renew my lease by tomorrow if I’m going to at all. Either that, or I WILL NEED A PLACE TO STAY BEGINNING AUGUST 2004. I would prefer if only people around the Maryland area would respond. Though I know Kevin needs a roommate up in Maine, I don’t really care much for the 15 minute commute from Columbia. I have a feeling 9 hours would get on my nerves. Unless you have a job that goes along with it. In which case, I AM LOOKING FOR A ROOM AND A JOB AND A ROOMMATE. MAYBE A DOG. I HAVEN’T DECIDED YET. Yeah, but I need to know by tonight if anybody just wants to hop into the extra rooms. Call me if you are seriously thinking about it. But not if you’re in a bad mood. I don’t need all that shit on my mind what with all this cicada nonsense looming over me.
So I went to the great Geoff Rupert’s wedding. If you don’t know Geoff, picture whatever friend of your who you’d thought would be a bachelor forever. Now picture him getting married. That’s Geoff. He was doing shots during his wedding and his dad was talking over the microphone. Mike went running over to him to tell him his dad was giving a speech and Geoff came back into the main room. After a few seconds, he returned to his shot. His dad was still talking and Mike gave Geoff a look…
“What? He wasn’t even talking about me.”
-Julie Rupert’s husband
Clinging onto whatever I can now,
Still Standing Right Here…