Review of For Love of the Game

for-love-of-the-game-movie-poster-1999-1010327221Well, I’m biased in both directions as far as this film is concerned. On one hand, I always love a good sports film, but on the other hand, I disagree with Kevin Costner getting in another baseball uniform unless he wants to do it as a manager. He was already old when he did Field Of Dreams, and that was 10 years ago. Actually, I just found out the man is only 44. I guess the receeding hairline thing he has going on threw me for a loop. Now that I think about it, I suppose Kevin was a perfect pick to play an aging, on-the-blunt-end-of-retirement, burnt out pitcher. At least he would have been better than Bob Saget or Merryl Streep, who I heard were also being considered for the part. Personally, I think Cal Ripkin would have been the obvious choice. Well, I like how this movie took a Jerry McGuire approach to filmmaking. It was two completely seperate movies really. One was a movie about a guy and a girl and how they fell in love and shit. The other was an intense film about a man’s baseball career coming to an unwanted end. The plots crossed paths every so often, but you could really make two different movies by concentrating on one or the other or at least turning one down and the other up a few notches. Like treble and bass, I suppose. Well, For Love Of the Game, as it was, was a very good mix of both the treble and bass. One part chick flick, one part guy flick. The chick I was with liked the girly part, and the guy in me liked the cool part. Compared to Jerry McGuire, the sports part was a little more predictable than I’d have liked, but the girly part was much more tolerable (sorry ladies, but that “You complete me” stuff just made me think that the movie wanted to think it was much deeper than it was). So what is For Love of the Game about? Well, Kevin plays a pitcher toward the very end of his contract and career. (By the way, I now like calling actors by just their first name). The manager of Kevie’s team is selling the team and trading him to San Fran or something like that, unless he’s going to retire. The Kev-man doesn’t know if he wants to do this, so the game that the movie centers around is possibly his last game ever. The flick had some very excellently placed flashbacks, which made up probably 85% of the film as it was. The movie is really dependent on character development, which is good, considering it has, with few exceptions, a relatively predictable plot. But thankfully, the movie doesn’t have nearly as many independent clauses as that last sentence. But it showed us his relationship with players from other teams, some rookie-type guy on his team, and his best friend, his catcher. It was a very well-thought out film with respect to the placement of scenes and information in a very non-linear, non-chronological film. And I think Kelly Preston wanted something too. But it wasn’t constant dirty sex like in the beginning of Jerry McGuire, so I wasn’t paying too much attention. All in all, For Love of the Game was a good film. Very worth seeing. And it’s a good date movie because you’ll both like it (probably). Upon retrospect, I’m glad I didn’t go see The Sixth Sense with a chick because then I’d probably have had to talk about it afterward instead of just sit there in awe of how great it was. That’s why I like Joe. He’s always a good guy to just sit next to in awe. But I think I’ve traveled away from the point I may have been trying to make here. I’m giving For Love Of the Game 8 bugs. It’s got a predictable ending, but it is a very good screenwriting feat, nonetheless.

Alright, this quote came after a long night driving back home from Ocean City, NJ to Bridgeport, PA by way of Cheese Quake, NY (we missed a turn somewhere along the way)…

Quote Of the Day 9/24/99

Char’s friend: “Is there a way I can get up at 6:15?”
Actual Char: “Yeah. Well…, there’s a way you can set an alarm to go off at 6:15.”

I think we’ve all been there. And I’m pretty sure I remember him leaving
sometime around noon.

For Love of the Bed,
Sleepy Cricket.

Still Standing Right Here…

Rating My Friend’s Senses of Humor

All of my friends have pretty much the same sort of sense of humor, but there are some notable differences. I may very well get my ass reamed for this, but I’m going with it anyway.

My Friend’s Senses of Humor

Tony – Tony is definitely the wittiest of the whole group. And he’s damn quick too. Tony’s major flaw is that he’s only funny to a select group of moderately to highly intelligent, well read folk. And a lot of it is subtle, so if you aren’t listening close enough, you won’t even recognize it as a joke. Basically I’m saying that if you don’t think Tony’s funny, it’s probably because you’re dumb. If comedy was like baseball, Tony would be leading the league in hits. A

Kevin (the cowboy) – Kevin is like the sleeper of the group. You really don’t expect him to be as funny as he is, but he is. If slugging percentages were given out to comedians, he’d be leading the league. Kevin has a filter to get rid of most of the bad jokes he thinks of, and he’s the best at saving the bad ones that still get through. But he still dresses like a cowboy and he moved to Oregon. Still, he’s definitely got the best delivery of all of us. A

Mikey McConover – Mike’s filter is busted. He knows it. He sometimes has to look behind him after he tells a joke, like when you’re trying to convince people you aren’t the one who farted. But he’s best with shock value humor. Like spewing stuff from your nose kind of humor. I sound like I’m stretching but I’m really not. Mike’s actually a good all around ball player. He’d probably lead the league in stolen bases and strikeouts. As in the kind that happen to him, not the kind the he happens to other people. A

Good Joe – With the possible exception of myself, I would probably say that this guy would be the next person in line to pretend to hit themselves in the balls, or actually hit themselves in the balls if the situation called for it to get a laugh. In case you don’t want to guess what I meant by that statement, I’m basically saying that Good Joe will take a pratt fall and make it look good. He’s more willing to go for the physical humor than most. It’s when he opens his mouth that things start to go wrong. He’s probably up there in the hit by pitch category. A

Well, you didn’t think I was going to start a fight, did you? And the A+’s are reserved for people like Paul Reiser and Ryan Stiles. Maybe my dad. Anyway, this is a follow-up joke that describes what we think is funny around each other when we go out. This has a very good possibility of not being funny to anybody else. There, you’ve been warned. Anyway, this is what we think is funny at 1:30 AM on a Friday.

Quote Of the Day 9/23/99

Mike: “How long does it change you to take a shirt?”
GJoe: “Four.”

Take it for what it’s worth, but don’t try to read anything into it.
You’ll be here all night.

Going back to the minors,

Still Standing RIght Here…

Rating Things I Did This Week

The coolest thing about doing this instead of talking about myself is that I don’t have to sit around and try to think of what I did over the course of a week and try to force it to be funny like I normally do.

Things I Did This Week

Won 3 Soccer Games – This is always a good thing. Especially when I get 2 assists from goal and we win one by scoring two goals in the last 2 minutes. But coolest of all, is that we didn’t lose. A+

Lost 2 Soccer Games – You win some, you lose some. I lost these. And this was after I got kicked off the turf by the soccer team for the 3rd time in 4 days. And I also blocked a shot with my face and not only did that give me a nose bleed, but they scored off the rebound. But I still had fun. B-

Got Kicked Off the Turf (again) – For the 3rd day out of 4, the varsity soccer team bumbed me off the turf. Geoff said he heard me say the F word more in that hour than he had in the first year and a half I was working with him. We made due and played up on the grass (mud) field using cones for boundaries and a goalie box. I hate our current management. D-

Went On A Date With A Redhead – A+. That’s all you need to know.

Ran Out Of Brake Fluid – Well, it’s taken a while, but something finally went wrong with the car. It’s extremely bad, but it should make for some pretty neat stories by the end of the week. C

Well, as I walked in the door to call the redhead the night of my date, the blond I was seeing a few weeks ago called. That was an awkward conversation. It became inherently obvious that April wasn’t going to be able to handle me dating other women and just be friends. It’s a longer story than I have time to tell you here. Anyway, I was telling this to Good Joe over a game of tennis, and this is what he had to say…

Quote Of the Day 9/22/99

Me: “It looks like I’m going to have to get rid of April.”
GJ: “Yeah. I’ve never been a big fan of May either.”

Now August, there’s a cool ass month!

Driving with my foot above the emergency brake,

Still Standing Right Here…

Rating Ways To Get Money Illegally

Ways To Get Money Illegally

Pickpocketing – This takes a lot of skill and a lot of confidence. If you go into a pickpocket not so sure of yourself, you’re gonna screw it up. And it’s not like you can play it off like you didn’t mean to take their wallet out of their jacket. I give props to good pickpockets. Bad pickpockets probably get their ass kicked a lot. A-

Blackmail – What a wussy way to get money illegally. People who blackmail other people usually don’t even need the money, they just found something out they shouldn’t have and try to get whatever advantage they can out of it. Blackmail is for pussies and capitalists. D-

Armed Robbery – People often get hurt in cases of armed robbery, and I’m not a big fan of people getting hurt, especially innocent people. And they have to be mean usually, or people just don’t take them seriously. But at least they don’t beat around the bush. “I have a gun. Gimme your money.” No bullshit. You either have to have big balls or be stoned to be an armed robber. C+

Breaking Into A Bank or Other Place While They Are Closed To Steal Stuff – I’m sure there’s probably a shorter legal phrase that means that, but you all know what I’m talking about, which is good enough for me. I can appreciate this. These people take this stuff seriously. It’s like a real job. I set up inflatable pepsi cans for Ravens games, they break into banks and steal money. You need to be smart to do this stuff. And they really go out of their way to make sure nobody gets hurt. And they have neat tools that cut glass in circles. If I found out a friend was one of these people, I probably wouldn’t turn him in. If I found out he was a blackmailer, I’d kick him in the nuts. A+

Quote Of the Day 9/21/99

“How long does it change you to take a shirt?”
-Mikey Khanover

Once he had already botched the coherent and grammatically correct sentence, he still decided to run with it. That was the cool part.

Embezelling and proud,
No Nipples.

Still Standing Right Here…

Rating My Nicknames

Well, apparently all those quotes I sent to you guys last week got lost in Floyd and are currently spread out all around Connecticut and Quebec now being read by tons of non-paying non-subscribing northernly folk. I’ll bet the Canadiens don’t even understand it either. Well, I’ll have to sum up everything I said last week. First off, I want to try to critique things that the Brunching Shuttlecocks wouldn’t do so I don’t get accused of plagerization. So here’s a topic I’ll bet they haven’t gotten to yet:

My Nicknames

Extendo – I’ve gotten more mileage out of this nickname than I did out of my last car. It’s the name of my intramural volleyball team, it’s part of my password for almost everything, and I was able to pick up a girl at the volleyball house because I was wearing a jersey with the name printed on the back. That relationship didn’t last very long. Apparently, she was looking for an Enduro. A

Nipples – I don’t much care for this nickname. I made it up as a sort of defense of my own pride. I decided to exploit my own asthetic defect (having unusually large nipples) before anyone else to avoid getting a worse nickname for it. Kinda like how I call my “attache” a purse to suck all the fun out of Tony teasing me about carrying around a purse everywhere I go. Don’t ever call me this. D

Air Fisher – This nickname kinda died out a while ago. It sounds cocky to the layman, but once that layman finds out I got the nickname bowling, it’s OK. I have a tendency to loft (hurl) the ball about 5-6 feet in the air before it lands on the lane when I bowl. But it’s not very catchy. C

Screaming Cricket – I got this name from a good friend when we were making Cherokee Indian nicknames. He gave me Screaming Cricket and I gave him Migrating Duck. Mine stuck. His didn’t and I don’t think he minds. A-

The Quorax – I really like the name and it’s very applicable. “Quorax, protector of the quotes.” But I try not to delve into the area of self flattery that often and a nickname just isn’t the same when you give it to yourself. Just ask Prime Time or Neon Deion or whatever he wants to be called now. B-

Mr. Whistlehead – I love it. I got it from one of my kids the first year I worked at day camp because I always wore a whistle on a band around my head. So it definitely has a cool origin. Now let’s analyze the actual name. If you don’t know where it comes from, it sounds really random and funny. I went so far as to name a film that I made about a loser of a character (I casted Proz to play the part) Mr. Whistlehead. I might be able to get the 18-25 yr old chicks with “Extendo” on my back, but a Whistlehead jersey would probably have the 8-12 yr old crowd turning their heads a good 98 degrees. A+

Dr. Hustle – OK, no one has ever called me this, but if you guys started, I really wouldn’t mind. There might me a Quorax tote bag in it for you too. No rating.

Well, when I first met Drew, we gave each other those Indian nicknames I mentioned above. Nick also wanted to be part of out clan. The following day, we were sitting outside waiting for X-Country practice to start and we were trying to think of names. Usually, when a child is born in that culture, they name the children after teh first thing they see, like “Running Brook,” or “Two Frogs Trying To Mate On A Small Rock In The Middle Of That Running Brook” and stuff like that. So as I said this, we looked up to see what was in front of us. Robyn Gaylon, a real sexy cheerleader just happened to be standing right in front of us bending over with her short-ass skirt on to stretch or whatever. We didn’t care why. Nick said to me without turning his head away “Dustin, I have my name.” I smiled, and also not looking away, I replied “What’s that, Nick?”

Quote Of the Day 9/20/99

“Sprouting Weasel”
-Sprouting Weasel

This is actually remarkably similar to how “Extendo” came about.

A rose is still a rose,
Mr. Whistlehead.

Still Standing Right Here…